Lots of you asked me to go on Giant Bomb's podcast, so I did -- I would recommend skipping through me on it, though. I'm listening to it being pretty horrified at my blabbing on drunk/exhausted/wired/too loudly. Yikes, sorry everyone ;_; (and special sorry to the Giant Bomb team, srsly was just not aware of myself)
[apt comic is by artist natalie dee]
79 comments:
Don't worry about it. A lot of your points were really quite incisive.
i'm sort of embarrassed, i didn't realize i was talking over everyone like that :(
Yeah, well, you were, lol ;). But the the stuff you said on PlayStation Home, Resident Evil and the various conferences was pretty insightful and made up for it.
Podcasting just takes practice. You rambled quite a bit, but it's hard to hold it against you since you had very interesting things to say. Please feel free to try again and don't let that embarrassment dissuade you.
To be honest, it was the most interesting Bombcast in awhile...
Yeeeah, I skipped to around the one hour mark after a 15 minutes of the virtual worlds discussion. But it did get me interested in your blogs. So thanks for that?
You weren't that bad...no, you were. Haha, sorry.
You know what will make it better though? Boning.
...you know, I guess you can say you were drunk or tired or whatever, but I wonder if you do that to everyone and just haven't realized it until now.
Kind of brutal, not going to lie.
Keep up the blog stuff though.
You were way cool. So cool I just typed "way cool" and I'm way to old to use such language. Your inane yet insightful rambling has gained you a new reader!!
Don't worry, you babbled but who doesn't after a few. The points you made (sub. Res Evil lovey dovey) were very agreeable. I liked how you stood up for the PS3 motion thing, I was seriously impressed by that too yet felt everyone wasn't giving due credit for some reason.
It was a little rough, but I agree with you on the S.S. uniforms
well, i'd been super wired and going non stop all day, stressed etc. i'm definitely not normally quite like that. but like jason says, it definitely makes me look at that a little more closely. thanks for having a sense of humor, yawl.
You did fine. Many of your points were interesting and valid. Especially on the sexuality of Resident Evil. Personally I found the relationship between Wesker and Brainwashed Jill a bit creepy. He grew out her hair, coloured it blond, put her in a skin tight jumpsuit with heels and then dressed her as a plague crow.
Very skin crawly.
Bikini armor-clad warrior women BONIN' in a CRPG = BAD
Cute anime characters having 'meaningful' relationships in a Japanese game = GOOD
I loved it. And said so on twitter to you. =D I think the problem is the bombcast is typically more of a comedy show than a critical talk about games. I think in the right venue, I'd ADORE hearing more in that vein. But yeah ... you totally irked the hell out of the diehard bombcast fanbase.
But that's more a kneejerk reaction between what they expected and what they got (Think Raiden in MGS2!) than disparaging your performance.
Don't worry about it. It helps to know why it happened that way, but why did they just post it without any context or editing? That doesn't seem very professional of them.
Literary Rock Star -- yeah, I understand that. The weird thing was I wasn't really aware that I was taking such a divergent tone at the time.
YAY LEIGH YOU RUINED IT FOR EVERYONE
I think you were great on the bombcast. You got really into a lot of topics with an energy that the guys don't usually have, it was refreshing. Also, the fact that you are an all things Japan loving type was a nice balance to the guys who are very pro microsoft and not really into, say, the social commentary inherent in the MGS series the way you are. As for me, thats what I love most about MGS, how deeply cerebral those games are.
I found what you had to say on the Bioware RPGs being a very nerdy conception of what "cool" is and what "badass" means very insightful, I totally agree with you. Are you into Evangelion by any chance? It sounded very Anno-y.
Thanks, and I hope to hear more from you on the bombcast soon.
P.S. Don't listen to the comments at Giant Bomb. Like with most video game websites, sadly, a lot of the more vocal users there are really immature, misogynistic males.
And in the end, it's only a podcast so who really gives a shit.
I was rolling my eyes on the RE talk, and I think the metaphorical MGS talk was just you looking too far into it and seeing what you wanted to see, but hey, I still thought you brought up interesting things to listen to.
And hey, I'm one of those Bioware losers that likes to feel like playing those games is a substitute for social interaction thank you very much! Well, not really, but I still like them for what they do. You should try out Baldur's Gate if your impression of them are entirely on their recent work.
Hey, just listened to the Giantbombcast as i do every week and you really put a fight with jeff and ryan. Hilarious, I look forward to reading your twitter posts x
Anonymous -- yeah, I'm really sorry about that. I definitely could have articulated what i meant without being judgmental and insulting, and I feel terrible.
I'm not sure I really agree with Literary Rock Star though. The folks on Giant Bomb are more than happy to tear right into real analysis, commentary, and opinion, in a friendly casual tone... the only real problem was just the sheer degree to which you dominated airtime.
What you had to say was worth saying, but with the number of interesting people who were in that room, you just gotta make some quick points and then share the mike and sit back and hope you get to hear something interesting from the next person... or another thing I think you'd do really well is throwing questions out to the others.
Nope, you're totally right PositivelyGreg -- the real thing that upsets me about this is not that I talk loud and/or fast (I def do that often in real life) but that I got so focused on what I was saying that I didn't realize I was butting in on everyone else to such an extent.
SVGL -- While it was a little annoying, I wouldn't worry too much about it.
People who are overly critical, probably have never had a *really* long day, and then drank on top of it. No one comes across as 100%.
I thought there was much more good than bad. I also think a lot of listeners understand the context that the podcasters have been on the go for days with little sleep and where doing some partying.
I thought a lot of your comments were insightful and much more interesting than the normal "this game looks cool" conversation. I wish more podcasts would dive into some of the development and business aspects of games more.
It also was apparent that you are passionate about your work. I too often catch myself going off when people bring up subjects I work with.
A few items of constructive criticism. The MGS4 talk was interesting, but I don't think this was the forum. People probably want to hear about new stuff as it was an E3 show.
You came off as a little judgmental with some of the nerd bashing. Also a little in denial about being judgmental.
Lastly, with the sexy Nazi uniform comments, now you can never run for political office.
Just to let you know, this apology definitely makes up for it. Many people do something that they know wasn't so great, but then defend the hell out of it no matter what. You have gained my respect.
In other words? As a diehard bombcast fan, I wouldn't mind hearing you on another bombcast. Just maybe not during the E3 stress.
Really, Leigh, it was a nice bit of controversy you brought to the Bombcast. Don't worry too much about how you were perceived; it will be forgotten in the minds of most people within a day or two.
Also, you did provoke some of the funniest lines from Ryan, Jeff et al. My personal favourite: when Ryan asked if you were, and I quote, "fucking out of your mind", when you were talking about Nazi uniforms being "objectively sexy". Priceless :D
And for what it's worth, I hadn't really heard of you, your blog and Gamasutra before now (no offense). So you at least gained one new reader.
I'm pretty sure I'll never be invited on again, haha
What? I loved you on the BombCast. I wish you would come back more often because you had great points and really funny opinions. Yeah, fuck RE5, the last good RE was Code Veronica, 100% agree. You bring good diversity to the BombCast because your opinions are varied and present a good contrast to what can sometimes be predictable banter from the guys.
I hope you are on the giantbombcast again or other podcasts. You brought a fresh perceptive as a female in the industry and as someone who does more in depth work on the business side. If not the bombcast, I would love to hear you with the Idle Thumbs guys.
I also like the fact you came out in favour of the lone gamer. I as well am no fan of co-op and multiplayer. There ain't a darn thing wrong with sitting down and thoroughly enjoying a single player experience.
I'm listening to it right now. You brought a lot to the table, and were very passionately well spoken. I hope to hear you on more podcasts, and not just the Bombcast.
i've been on others and most of them (except RPS~) more soberly and calmly. if you search "podcast" in the Blogger search bar I'm sure you'll find some.
Extremely difficult to listen to with you speaking over everyone... However it appears you are aware of what happened so I look forward to you returning to the bombcast.
I am a giantbomb fan who just heard you on the bombcast and I thought you were great! I am now a Leigh Alexander fan, I hope to hear you on a future podcast...or many future podcasts.
I have to agree with you returning to the Bombcast. I, personally, am interested in the contrast it would provide.
no you were actually pretty fucking good.
Ive been listening to the bombcast since the very first, and even tho you are getting pretty blasted the in the comments over there, I don't think you were particulary bad. Maybe I just love the bombcast too much that any is fine with me :P
Leigh, if you want to make yourself feel better, go back and listen to any past GDC or E3 Bombcast, regardless of the cast they all devolve into the same madness. Eight people talking at the same time plus alcohol never turns out well. At least part of the response has to be because you are a female (your voice is easily identifiable amongst the general chatter), which is such a novelty on video game podcasts.
Though you did tend to hog the air time i really did find alot of what you said interesting, though not always something i agree upon.
The MGS4 thing was interesting and i hadn't looked at the game in that context before, yet at the same time i wonder who else would?
but i tend to look at movies in similar way, getting more out of it then my friends do, and right or wrong i've always enjoyed the movie more for it.
Love to hear you on a podcast again, particularly if the theme is a in-depth look at a game/series, i think it would be very entertaining.
I got the feeling you forgot you were making a podcast and it just changed in to a fun discussion between friends. Don't worry it wasn't the first and sure won't be the last GiantBomb podcast going haywire. You might have offended some people but there were a lot of truths in what you said as well.
Just popped by listening to the GB cast, caught your self pimpage. It was actually fun hearing another, although slightly louder sparks-infused, voice. Not as bad as some things Ive heard from others at convention podcasts, I assure you.
you can say you were being judgemental, insulting and opinionated, but honestly it came across that you just wanted to be understood. or accepted? this does not makes you a bad person.
you should go back on sober, your points were thoughtful and considered and it was interesting to hear another, more industry minded perspective.
Nictel -- bingo. That's exactly what happened.
You did a great job, you don't need to be embarrassed about anything. I esp love all your points on Kojima and Metal Gear, you're totally right about everything. F all the haters on Metal Gear.
Can't say I agreed with everything you said (Nazi suits cute? Uhhh...) and I'm not sure what you actually said and meant, but I am so glad we have more women in the industry pushing themselves more in things like podcasts. The other day, I was listening to a Gamers with Jobs podcast, and the woman on was barely saying anything, pretty much just waiting for jump in while being cut off. This is something I did on the first podcast I did, but soon remedied.
The way it's been working, it's talk or be talked. There's other guys that do it, but it's not as noticeable when a woman does it because as the norm goes, it's only one woman and sticks out like a nudist in Alaska.
Still, I felt that you were overwhelming, but that was the alcohol, and you are forgiven. Besides, I don't think I've paid any more attention to the GBcast than I did today.
Yeah, it was...kind of...it was terrible.
But eh, don't worry, at least you make amends. And don't worry, you are not the first person to get fucked up by Gerstmann's Sparks. :D
No, she wasn't good. She ruined the Bombcast that I love.
Hey Leigh: While my initial reaction was "NEVER!", I do forgive you and hope you do come back on the Bombcast again in the future.
Maybe next time, just skip the taste test/Sparks.
And I'm also one of those defensive BioWare fans, but I've cooled down. You're clearly a deep thinker as far as games are concerned, and while I disagree with you on almost everything, I respect your ability to speak your opinions with confidence.
As a fan of GiantBomb since day 1, and someone who has listened to every last one of their podcasts, I must say that I found your appearance to be a welcome change. Yes, you may have dominated the show a bit while you were on, but I didn't mind. What you had to say impressed me enough to lead me to this site, and what I've read so far has lead me to add this site to my favorites. Any future podcast appearances I should look out for?
i thought you were great. my only concern was wondering if you were being a little too honest for a journalist of your profile. i've listened to every bombcast and they're always a joy. this one ranks up with the best of them. it was unfair that they challenged you to say something negative about MGS4 and then came down on you for being negative. that you didn't call them out on it I'll rack up to your recreational beverages. please bombcast again and be just as interesting!
You don't need to worry about it. I'm a Giant Bomb regular user and it's not a big deal to me. If this happened on one of the weekly Bombcasts, it would be a bigger deal, but since we have 4 bombcasts this week, I don't think that most people will care.
I really enjoyed your Giantbomb appearance. Think of it this way: You gave us a rare insight into the kinds of conversations that go on when people that are similarly employed get together. I was particularly fascinated by the virtual worlds discussion (again, it's quite rare to hear unfiltered honesty in a public forum). Also, don't sweat the interpersonal communication faux pas of over assertion (being the only woman in a roomful of men causes the occasional overcompensation). You have gained another loyal reader.
I actually really enjoyed your presence on the podcast. Granted, I was playing the Uncharted 2 Beta while listening, so I never really picked up on you talking over people, but I thought just about everything you had to say was pretty spot on. Your thoughts on Resident Evil, Home, Bioware, and most importantly Metal Gear were all pretty in tune with my own. Actually, on MGS4, I had never really thought of it being a commentary on Western/Japanese game design. That part really interested me and allowed me to appreciate my favorite game series even more, so thank you for that.
I liked what you had to say, so don't be too hard on yourself.
All that stuff about Resident Evil was great. It was impassioned and uncalled for, which is pretty much the Bombcast way.
I love Metal Gear Solid 4 with a passion. I hate how you're so quick to dismiss others negative opinions on the game because they "don't get it." "Go fucking shoot something." Seriously? Maybe it's just not their kind of game.
Please don't come on the Bombcast anymore.
I'm so glad you realized it. lol I love your writing, but when I heard this podcast, I was like whoTF is this? Shut up! I'd like to see you back on the Bombcast when you're a little more together. Don't worry though, this is the internet. People will forget next week (or sooner).
Video game sex,or Puppet fucking as i like to refer to it as; Only for comedic purposes....fact.
I'd never heard of you before...come to ya from the GB.
I'mma try ta put this nicely (a statement which already comes across as "i'mma be a dick here now") your performance on the bombcast was...lets say "extreme"? ...but in the "do the dew" kinda "extreme"... ya see what i'm gettin at........it was kinda obnoxious, alright, BUT, yeah, i actually agreed with a lot of what you were putting on the table...so i can't hate ya and i beleive that if you could calm the hell down, tame that nerd surge, in a chatty situation that what you have to say is worth listening to and makes for an interesting clash.
...and the M40 (nazi helmet) is pretty kick ass, yes...and no, i have nothing against jewish people, no interest in world domination, nore do i feel the need to sport Charlie Chaplin's facial hair fashions.
thank you for listening.
Thank god you at least apologized cause you basically ruined the Bombcast's perfect record. Every podcast before the one you were on was amazing. I find it hard to believe that as a guest you acted rudely to the people hosting the podcast and were rude to all the other guests by saying "I KNOW!!" and than cutting them off mid sentence. Please if you want to do podcasts go on ign hell go on 1up but please if you really do want to apologize never go on the bombcast again.
@Anonymous: Perfect record? Some of their larger group podcasts have been a bloody mess of yelling and subject changing 2 miles a second. I remember their last large group one(That wasn't E3) was pretty much unlistenable. It was junk with 10 people yelling at the one time.
She got a bit crazy, that's it. It's a damn podcast not an emmy awards. People getting upset need to get over it. I think she'd be fine on another bombcast after being aware she was too loud and interrupting in this one.
Negative comments abound when you're not face to face with people.
I'd agree that you were too hyper but would welcome you back on the BC when you were more chilled
Liked the bombcast, but that show was not a good fit for that kind of discussion. The podcast I would love to see you on is RebelFM, because that is the exact thing they love to talk about. Doubt you guys run in the same circles, but a person can dream
I've never heard of you before, but I just listened to the Bombcast.
The people I know that talk too much usually have no substance in what they say. But in this podcast everything you said was dead on.
I now demand a daily or weekly podcast with at least you and the normal crew.
cheers.
Hey I'm the guy who just posted about the perfect record and how she should never be on again and I would gladly go face to face with her....... but I can't I'm in a different country. Guys stop saying its ok just cause shes a girl, I think she can handle a couple of negative comments. She should never go on the bombcast again or if she does want to go she should learn some manners and how to be a guest not be drunk after a "hard" days work.
Were you the female version of Mancow?
If you were then BANNED! j/k
was looking forward to that episode now really want to hear it now.
YOU did say sorry. You did your best Charles Barkley impersonation: "Sorry TNT and T-Mobile, I just really wanted a bj from that hooker."
You apologized and that's all anybody can ask for.
I started drinking later on in life (mid-twenties). One Sat. night me and 2 female co-workers went into the city (SF for you non-no cals) for some fun. Needless to say I got drunk and became like THAT stupid high-schooler drunk for the first time.
I trash talked and spewed a lot of venom and hate; ruined the ladies' evening.
No matter how much I wanted to turn the clock back and hit redo I couldn't. All I could do was say sorry as much as possible, accept the fact I was a jerk for ruining their fun and move on.
Claiming alcohol in drunk driving is unacceptable. But, IMO, being drunky for podcasting or recreating the sex scene in Mass Effect every once in a blue moon is forgivable. See how I just made Mass Effect cool again :|
I'm bewildered at GB needs to be serious. GameSpot died a long time ago and it's time to move on. It is not GS v.2. It's powered by booze, pancakes, and you. And has a video called 2 Human. It's a blend of information and entertainment and I don't think it tries to disguise itself as being something else.
Anonymous says: 'I think she can handle a couple of negative comments. She should never go on the bombcast again or if she does want to go she should learn some manners and how to be a guest not be drunk after a "hard" days work.'
Perfectly agree. Harshness = totally earned.
It was funny, and a little bit awkward to listen to, but hey, now i'm here, reading your blog, so... no such thing as bad press?
Leigh. Thanks to you I can finally say that I have chosen not to listen to a Giant Bomb Podcast. I know you don't know me but this Podcast is one of my favorite things in my lil world and has helped me quit WoW (no small feat!). I was going to go on a tiny internet tirade like so many pre-pubescent children have done before me, but it seems like you are reasonable enough to know how you ruined what should have been an extremely fun podcast. I wish you luck and sobriety should you ever come back onto the Giant Bombcast again.
Adios.
Leigh,
I have to say, having just heard your name on other blogs and not knowing much about you personally, I didn't come into the Bombcast as a fan and to be honest, I agree with your own personal assessment, no need to go further.
Having said all that, I'm COMPLETELY sold on your owning up to it on your blog. You didn't ignore it or try defend it, you simply agreed it didn't go well, you realize it, and you'll move on. Perfect attitude.
I agree with others, don't let this discourage you from doing podcasts again, simply learn from it and adjust as necessary.
Take care and cheers.
nah... booze automatically makes people sexier and funnier, this is a verifiable fact
well done!
You weren't so bad. Go back and listen to Jeff on their PAX podcast if you want to hear some really bad drunken rambling.
I try to give everyone a fair chance and I did with you too but ass soon as you started to make fun of bioware and the people that play there games I got a little offended. Yes it was a joke but bioware is my favorite game maker and you saying that there nerds for putting sex scenes in there games made me think if i was a nerd and if i would ever find someone blah blah blah. I'm over it now but when I listen to the bombcast I try to forget my troubles not spawn new ones:(
Heartfelt apologies for the "nerd" comments, Anonymous. It was insulting and wrong of me to say it that way. Clearly I'm a person with tons of awkward moments too :)
Nobody cares, you're a loudmouth cunt and the podcast just showcased it in front of everyone who would bother to listen to it.
When you said "I have to leave in 5 minutes" I jumped for joy but than you talked even more:(
Okay, I think that's enough for now.
I just posted the nerd comment and surprised you responded so fast lol nah its ok i just thought about it for awhile cause the only games I play are KOTOR and Mass Effect:P
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